December 2004

December 9, 2004

    Well that time has come and gone again. Final exams are over for me for another semester. It was all in good fun, I worked kind of hard at times and actually got to know the material quite well. Afterwards I met my associate Brown and did something terrible that will never be told to anyone. A fiendish act never to see the light of day. Afterwards we went to the mall and picked up some things before starting a magnificent dinner. In the next 36 hours I will be departing to destination unknown and will be back at an unknown time as well, so don't bother trying to steal anything cause I could pop in to catch you in the act. I'm the kind of guy you don't want to catch you in the act of stealing. This means that the posting will take a hiatus for awhile. Sorry.

    I had a Starbucks thing today, it was good, assumedly expensive but good nonetheless. It was purchased as a gift, even though I refused. I am the first one done the exams so we're into that awkward phase were everyone else is still working. I can't make a noise or they will lose it. Its really quite trying for me as I am usually a boisterous person. This has not been helped by the empty houses on either side of our own. I'm not seeing much of a point of message being generated out of this post so I'll wrap things up with one of my quick and boring stories.

    It all starts with this dude planning a trip to New York for his friends and colleagues. The response is overwhelming and many people confirm their participation within minutes. A short time goes by and they are inquiring about where to pay to really secure their spot. The payment deadline comes and goes and not half of those registered turn in the money, in fact, many are pulling out. I pose the question, why? I don't know. I can only say that I'm not impressed and I'm the kind of person who if offered something of this nature I would not accept until I knew that I was serious about going. Soon the trip will be in peril and only the true and the righteous (me) are going to suffer. What gives? Society is probably to blame. I don't know. It's not my nature to think about deeper issues so I'll pass out now with my attempt at something meaningful coming out left in complete disarray once again. Peace out rabbit.

December 7, 2004

    I am awesome. I have been studying for my one final exam for the past one day. It is tomorrow, note the lack of concern of my face. I feel that I will be prepared to take this test of knowledge. Actually I'm feeling very confident and powerful lately. More on that in a bit. As you know I've been without any real responsibility for some time now, well since my previous post, and I knew when my exam was but do you think that I prepared in advance? Of course not. I took the weekend off and then did a marginal amount of work on Monday and then some more yesterday and the bulk today. I find myself asking, why is this? Why do students put things off as long as possible. Not all students partake of this foolish ritual, only a select few thousand. For me it adds to the challenge that our current education system provides. I received more than exceptional marks for most of my secondary education career but somewhere deep inside unbeknownst even to me my brain function was altered to be a procrastinator. Life became better outside of school or something. It came to a point where the idea of studying made me angry. So as a result, since that point in my life I have always put things off until the last minute. For various writing assignments I found that when doing this I am able to produce much better works when under the pressure of a deadline. For example, the paper I wrote in two hours (previous post) I got 81% on it. And last semester I did a similar act and got 93%. But for tests the challenge has been to see how little I can do without failing. I've slipped below the mark a couple of times but on the whole I feel that I've been winning. Now to take away any credibility that I may have had going for me. I feel that my academic and professional success is due in large part to the fact that I am the ring-bearer. I possess the one ring to rule them all. Well actually that was a bold faced lie. We all know that the almighty and powerful Wood is the holder of such a burden. You may not know it now since his simple viewer is not actually functioning right now but he is indeed the man of the hour, the toast of the tower. The ring that is on my finger is my man ring. Alright, alright, its not a man ring either. Its actually a ring that I won for participating in a hockey tournament when I was in grade nine...ish. Those years are a blur.

    So after all that malarkey, the take home message is only wear a ring if your friends don't ridicule you and if they do then imprint it on their forehead. Wait, that's a little too inappropriate. Fine, do whatever you want. Again, not suitable. Ok, just listen to your elders and do as your told because as we all know....big brother is watching.

December 3, 2004

    Yesterday was a big day. I got laid off....again. That happens at the end of all my summer positions. The big lay-off. Well, technically I'm getting paid for today as well, it's just that there was nothing further they needed from me so both parties moved on. I did however get a very nice parting gift in the form of a pull-over sweater. We consummated the event with a spur of the moment trip to The Hammer. The provocation for this journey was to get a hold of one of our friends that we were unable to reach via phone and electronics. I only agreed to go under the pretense that I could smoke a cigar in the car on the way there. I did for a bit and then ashed it out on the mirror (which made for an awesome spectacle of embers flying everywhere). Dave attempted to study in the back by lamp light. We made it there in good time and smelled like anus. However, our friend wasn't home and was assumed studying in a library. Little did we know that MacMaster University has like 5 libraries. We searched three from top to bottom sweeping out and scouring each floor like marines. We were unsuccessful and went back to the car only to find a parking ticket, of course! So we ventured back to his home and discovered him. After a pint at the local tavern we parted ways. He was non-committal regarding our planned trip to New York City. Which by the way is an open invitation that must be responded to by this Wednesday, December 8th. So all in all, losing the truck wasn't all that bad but I'm going to miss the old girl. And don't smoke kids......or drink and drive. (We didn't do that, I'm just putting the word out.)

November 2004

November 28, 2004

    Yesterday was a very productive day. I re-arranged my living space whilst cleaning it entirely. I filed all my past and present bills and other such oddities (school papers etc.). Last week I didn't post much as I was entangled in the web of excitement that is Halo 2. I beat it; ya, that's right. It is the first video game that I have ever beaten mostly on my own. With the cooperative play you can advance in you solo campaign. It's not as entertaining as the baseball for me being a sports junkie and all but it certainly is much more intense.

    On the other hand, during the days I finished most of my duties with "evil" Monsanto. I have only to wrap up expenses and say ta ta, this apparently will take me until Friday. Well they are forecasting that I will have Friday off, which is most excellent. As I momentarily reflect this blog I see it is chock full of errors, alas, I have gone too far to turn back now, hopefully some sort of error correction will right my wrongs. My hair is getting longer and longer and now covers most of my ears. It is essential to keep it clean now or the grease will become over-powering and could kill people. I don't know I just lost control there for a moment. Huh?

    One final note before I send this forth to the bowels of the internet, my accomplice Adam Brown is planning a trip into the great beyond, New York City. If you have not received the email containing the fine print then please email him at abrown06@uoguelph.ca or myself at phillipc@uoguelph.ca  There is a deadline for showing interest and we would like as many confirmations by Christmas as we can get so we can assure that there is adequate preparation. As it stands we have only a few dozen respondents and would like our horde to number in the hundreds. Finally my chance to lead a horde, its been my month long dream. Now I must go forth in search of what you mortals refer to as a cordless telephone in order to appease my creators. The holidays are a crazy time so watch out for random spots checks my police, they'll be out there until January.

November 21, 2004

    Well now, it seems that the great overseer has chosen me to represent his fringe group of followers by selecting me among others to be linked from his parent site. I am eternally grateful. I come to you live from my basement where I picking at some chicken flavoured noodles that just seemed to plentiful to me earlier. To pass the time I'll tell a funny story, well its not so much funny as long and boring but you might get a thrill so I urge you to press on. Hard. Hurry hard. (Curling.....no? too soon?)

    The first thing I venture into will be my fun-filled, jam-packed, eventful Friday night. Started things off at work, made Dave come and help me, he was recompensed with a free lunch courtesy of Monsanto Canada Inc. (My employer) We got a fair bit done and then rolled back home about mid-afternoon where preparations for supper began. We were to host a dinner party you see. I did no cooking, as per my usual. The dinner went off without a hitch and then like many a hockey starved fan we went to see some junior hockey courtesy of the Guelph Storm. The game turned out alright with the home squad making a strong effort in the end only to fall short again. This was followed by a party, a hot tub party to be exact. While we never partook of the hot tubbing we still have a good time. For those that don't know I've all but given up the drink so my fun was found elsewhere but was ironically due to the drink. The number of totally intoxicated people was at a high level so me and my wingman Brown took advantage of the situation and made fools of many a drunk. One girl in particular just kept coming back for more punishment. Now your probably sitting there, taken aback, mouth open in disgust or stupidity but let me assure we did nothing wrong, just innocent pranks. The best of which was when we struck a deal with the girl to go interrupt two people making out and offer them a piece of processed cheese which we supplied. She must have taken the task very seriously because when she came back she informed us that they didn't like processed cheese but would prefer mild cheese. Not funny, guess you had to be there. It was all good clean fun for the members of the family over 19. We wrapped things up and returned home late in the night. Saturday was a write-off. Sleep and video games coupled with movies and TV garbage. Sunday is going well, I did the dishes, made a meal, and now I'm updating this here. Well as I've reached my current position I suppose my anecdote should come to a close so happy trails sports fans.

November 18, 2004

    Hope all my faithful non-existent readers are ready for a rare but humble Thursday post. I couldn't possibly put a post without mentioning my new-found passion. As you may or may not know I have become an avid e-bay patron and recently purchased MVP Baseball 2003 (EA Sports) from some dude in Michigan. Well let me tell you...awesome game, friggin awesome, no, super friggin awesome. The highest rating that I can bestow upon a game of such nature. I also bought Madden 2004 (EA Sports) but unfortunately I don't have enough RAM to play it, thus a RAM purchase will be made in the near future. So needless to say I have been wasting all my time playing this new prodigal game. Also this week I partook of the new Halo game, Halo 2. It's intense and awesome. Note the lower ranking. I worked late on Monday and all but two of my plots have been harvested. School, as mentioned has been wrapped up and its onto the easier life.

    Changing gears a bit, there is now talk of a trip to New York City for a brief period in early January. Small entry fees. Inquire within. I'm bored and hungry so it must be supper time. For real though, inquire about the trip, first come first serve for the 55 spots. Good times ahead and ahoy.

November 9, 2004

    Good afternoon or evening. It is I back from the assumed dead. Ok so I haven't updated in a while. I've been busy. I watched Ofsaa cross country running this past weekend. That is a high school athletic endeavor. Why? Family. Ok, let's get down to brass tacks here. I only have work to gripe about and school to a lesser degree so let's get it out of the way. Work....the combine broke so all corn harvesting has to be done by hand. I do it alone. A description seems in order. I travel 24 minutes from my home to a field with a small designation of plots. In this field in enter the corn plots which are 12 meters long by 3 meters wide and all together (no spacing) and I shuck the cobs off the plants into a bucket. Said bucket is then returned to my truck and bagged and the process repeats. This has been going on for 2 weeks and no end is in sight. Its horrible work. As for school, I have a paper due Friday and then I have no responsibility until finals.

    Personal affairs is going to be my next point that I caress. I have no affairs to speak of. Moving on.....not so fast. I have undertaken the foolish task of writing a dramatic or at very least serious novel or short story. The project is top secret and in its the most infantile of stages of development. It could be a huge and moving story or film but sadly I see no end to it. Another thing that I've started that I'll never finish. Add that to my screenplay I started in high school and my education.....I'm kidding on that last one.

    On a lighter note my obsession with the facial hair design known as the mustache seems to have subsided, or at least lessened to a point where it doesn't consume me anymore. I have shaved my pathetic attempt and have no desire to re-visit that stage in my life. However, it appears as if huge sideburns are the new mustache. Luckily for me I can't grow them properly without long hair thus they will not reside on my face.

    Well this post got pointless in a hurry. I work, I sleep, I eat. In that order too. I have nothing important to offer at this time and I have nothing important to request either. Other than how do I play a game designed for Windows 95/98 on my Windows XP. The internet didn't help me. I should kill the internet someday. This double week post has drawn to a close.

October 2004

October 23, 2004

    Well today is Saturday and I had to work, much to my collective chagrin. I'm all talk it wasn't that bad, actually it was quite the opposite of bad, dare I say it was enjoyable. My lord no! It was tolerable was what it was, but I ramble.

    Well this past week is all a blur to me. I've been working long full days and sleeping very little, I guess I've arrived in the real world. So we've watched some movies and seen some good shows but the thing that is killing me is the baseball. The damn games are just too long and on too late but the catch is that they are so damn entertaining.....well relatively speaking of course. And for that matter why is late night talk shows so much more interesting than the daytime programming, its just not right. Conan is a riot though.

    Last weekend during one of the days Dave and I realized my destiny and ironically enough it is to watch Star Wars Episode II. I have not seen it and really want to. We've tried to rent it at multiple outlets and have come up short on any and all occasions. I send out a plea for someone to please hook me up with a copy legal or illegal. I need this. Please, Wood I'm counting you here.

    That's about all I can come up with for now with this damn movie blaring in the background. Well have a good week.

October 17, 2004

    Well, taking a page from that late great Wood I've decided to post my current events here, just to allow people to keep up with my dizzying life. For those that know better that is laden with sarcasm. Anyways let's just dive right in.

    Last night we went for a delightful supper in Cambridge which was supposed to be followed by pool playing but all available venues were overrun with patrons so alas no pool. We watched an action movie in lieu, it was enjoyable but thoughtless. Earlier in the week we ventured to Friday Night Lights which I endorse as awesome. Enough of this film drivel.

    Back tracking slightly I should mention that the previous evening we also had a big production supper which consisted of home-made manicotti. I found it to be delightful. Following my rules for big production meals I donned a tie and jacket to support the mood. The other present males followed suit (no pun intended) and the result was several humorous photos.

    Just to touch on my personal affairs.....nothing doing. Work is going fine, we're getting after it and soon the desperate struggle that is the harvest will be complete, for soybeans anyways. I enjoy the work and will probably accept the offer to tenure employ there for the summer to come.

    I don't really have anything else to add other than I enjoy PC Cola better than all other colas, take that Pepsi and Coke. Ta Ta for now.